Double Feature Tour Diary
Show 1 – Royal Hotel, Dungog
May 18th, 2023
Dungog is a 3 pub town of 2000 people not quite 3 hours north of Sydney, just over an hour from Newcastle and roughly 30 hours by train, plain and car from Avignon in Provence. However, Jean-Luc says it’s a tricky commute and he doesn’t recommend it.
It’s name supposedly derives from the local Gringai language and purportedly means Thinly Wooded Hills. However, this version was a romanticised concoction dreamt up in the 1920’s as part of a tourism promotion. The word actually stems from Dunkok, the Gringai name given to a single hill to the north of the town. In Gringai it means, a single hill to the north of the town.
The towns 3 favourite sons are Doug Walters [Australian cricketing all-rounder] Hugo Weaving [actor] and Kevin Bacon [not the actor] This Kevin Bacon was in fact a 3 time Olympic Equestrian Event rider whose best result was 7th in Tokyo in 1964, so given his modest results, there’s room on the podium if someone once to step up to 3rd on the list of Dungog favourite sons.
(Kevin Bacon second from the right with the 1964 Tokyo Olympic Event team that finished a disappointing 7th)
Whilst wandering down Dowling Street, I got talking to a local on a mobility scooter out the front of the Bank Hotel. I bought Ticker a schooner of Toohey’s New and he told me this yarn.
‘As kids, Kevin Bacon used to ride to Sydney with Hugo Weaving and Doug Walters on the back. He’d drop Hugo off at an audition and Doug would put their bets on at the TAB while they waited. Then they’d ride home again ... Buy me another schooner and I’ll tell you about the time they dressed up as bushrangers and held up the Titanic!’
If I was asked to edit the Wiki page for Dungog, I would not only include Ticker’s yarns, but I would add the following.
The price of wool in the craft stores suggests that the wool boom of the 1950’s has never ended in Dungog.
Scott’s ‘Speedy Cycles’ mountain bike store sadly doesn’t hire out penny farthing mountain bikes.
The historic James Theatre, one of very few Australian cinemas built in the Spanish Mission style, weirdly does not subtitle its films in Spanish.
The town has no recorded favourite daughters.
No-one has yet proven worthy of winning a Dungog Citizens Award.
There are always clashes when scheduling shows in regional communities. These events may or may not exist, but are used as an excuse by locals to explain the low attendance at the show. I was once told by a local without a hint of irony that … ‘It was madness scheduling your show on the same night as Natalie’s 21st. The orchid show is on tomorrow as well.’
In Dungog I found myself competing against ‘The Knitters Picnic Weekend’. It was always touch and go whether this would help or hinder with numbers for the show, but we decided to push on. Knitting aged women, form a key plank of the demograph for ‘Double Feature’ so there was every chance I would playing to the click clack of birch needles, despite the scheduling conflict. What we hadn’t factored in was the cost of a skein of wool in Dungog. It seems the exorbitant price of merino yarn had left them with little remaining disposable income. There was no sign of the yarnies in the audience.
There has been a Royal Hotel on the current site since in 1850, but the current art deco gem was built in 1939. The architectural style is known as the ‘P&O Ship Style’ because of its similarity to ocean liner forms and the difficulty patrons have in trying to locate their rooms after a night on the turps.
Beautifully renovated by Howard & Andrew, it is now a destination gastro pub with boutique accommodation, open fires and easily accessible lifeboats.
(Howard Glenn continuing his renovations while we try to rehearse. This wasn’t so bad, but later he wanted to sand the parquetry during the show)
With the help of music industry local Ben Speer, it has also become a regional music venue with an impressive roster of acts passing through since the venue opened in 2021 including Andrew Farriss, Paul Capsis, Emma Pask, Catherine Britt and, according to Ticker … ‘Dame Nellie Melba played there with the Hawking Brothers after the Dungog Warriors knocked off Maitland United in the NRL Grand Final.’
‘To my knowledge ‘Double Feature’ was the pub’s first foray into theatre, although again Ticker dubiously claimed that … Pierce Brosnan did a one man version of ‘Summer of the 17th Doll’ in the front bar.’ This programming variation had some ramifications that I wasn’t expecting. A patron interrupted me about 10 minutes into the show to ask when I was going to sing my first song; they seemed miffed when I wouldn’t do requests and they all held up swaying lighters during the curtain call. Of course, I’m gilding the lily here … but I did have a pair of knickers thrown at me as I left the stage. They were size 22 with a decent gusset and nearly knocked me off my feet.
Performing shows in non-traditional theatre venues has its challenges. One that presented itself at the Royal was that there was no backstage area. This meant it was difficult to remain obscured from the audience, so that I wasn’t seen in costume before the show. Subsequently, as I awaited clearance to start the show, I found myself loitering in a darkened passage adjacent to the kitchen. This unwittingly presented another problem. I was dressed in the attire of someone who might have attended the grand re-opening of the hotel in 1939. One the kitchen staff spied the spectral figure of someone in period dress and let out a scream thinking she’d finally spied the pub ghost. I quickly assured her that I was ‘of the living’ and walked back through the wall from whence I’d come.
The highlights of the show
Donna Marie Therese ardently volunteered to play the role of altar server. Each night I select someone to ring the bell to alert everyone when something Catholic is happening in the show. I always select a female or non-binary identifying audience member to right the wrongs of the patriachal Catholic church. Donna Maree Therese enthusiastically addressed the audience about her unrequited requests to become an alter server as a child, and how delighted she was to finally have the opportunity ring the bell, that had been denied her by her misogynistic parish priest.
The delicious mushroom risotto handed to me after the show.
After years of doggedly requesting that the venue have ‘one table decorated with a gingham table cloth and candelabra and all other tables unadorned’, Howard and Andrew finally delivered.
(my requirements to the letter)
I hope to get back to Dungog with another show soon so I can enjoy a bit more time exploring the region. Hopefully next time I’m not up against the Haberdashery Hoedown or the Patchwork Pageant.
If you are passing through Dungog, or just fancy a weekend at the Royal, get in touch with Howard & Andrew at the Royal Hotel Dungog
If you want to find out where Double Feature is playing next, you can find the dates and links in my gig guide